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Chalk It Up to a Phase

November 14, 2011
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The thing I most read about babies, or hear from other moms, is how everything is pretty much a phase.  A phase is not limited to certain behaviours or attributes, neither does it have a definable beginning nor end.  This leaves me scratching my head and wondering when does a phase become the norm?

Months 0 to 4 were pretty darn glorious with Baby A’s sleep.  A week into her fourth month I was still crossing my fingers hoping that we’d escaped the dreaded 4-month sleep regression when it hit.  It hit our house with a vengeance.

Unlike a lot of people I’ve talked to, getting Baby A to sleep isn’t the hard part.  It’s keeping her asleep.  It’s keeping her from being restless and fidgety and clawing at me in her sleep.  It’s keeping her from wanting to comfort suck to get back to sleep every time she wakes up.  It’s keeping her heat sinking missile body from pressing up against me and creating a pool of sweat right next to mine.

I feel hot, cramped and badgered in my attempts to sleep.  I’m starting to resent her neediness and the co-sleeping arrangement I once adored.  I’m also not silly enough to think that if by some miracle I could get her to sleep in her own bed that any of her frequent wakefulness would lessen.

We keep on trying to attribute her poor sleep to teething or to her not feeling well.  Perhaps it’s because she’s going through significant developmental or neurological growth.  There’s always some possible explanation, but the one thing remains constant is that this sleeping thing isn’t working for me.  At what point in time do I stop hoping that it’s a phase and do I try to do something about it, or in the least, accept it and move on?

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